alienation

As I was doing my morning study in my CR Bible this jumped out at me and I wanted to share: "Denial tells us that we're getting away with our secrets. We think that no one knows - but they do. While denial may shield us from the full force of the hurt, it also prevents us from helping ourselves or the people we love the most. We don't dare to reveal our true self to others for fear of what they'll think or say if they catch a glimpse of the real us. We're convinced that we have to protect ourselves - and our secrets - at any cost. So we isolate ourselves to minimize the risk of exposure and possible rejection by others. But at what price? The eventual loss of all our important relationships."

I don't know about anyone else but I know I do this. I'm so worried about what others will think of me that I don't do the healthy thing which is share my feelings. I've seen the very dangerous place that this can lead to, depression. I've been there done that and I'm not going there again! I know that only God can help me and that's what I'm going through Celebrate Recovery right now. Wow, even admitting that is kinda scary and I guess freeing in a way. I don't want people to think that I'm messed up and am one of "those people" but you know what? I am one of those people. I am a human and I have hurts that haven't been addresses and I want to be free from that! While this journey may be a hard one I know that my God is faithful and he will guide me through to the other side of freedom and better relationships with people and I'm looking forward to that day.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. Amen.